I was recently listening to The Rise & Conquer Podcast Ep:37 Honour The Season Your In by Georgie Stevenson. In the episode Georgie said something that really hit home for me. ”Honour the season your in, stop looking around and feeling like your missing out or your not doing what you should be doing. Really trust you are where you need to be and stop falling into that fear mentality”. -GS
This season of my life that I’ve been in since getting sick by far has been the strangest I’ve gone through. It kind of feels like I’m in a bubble, watching the world go by around me while I’m stuck in the same 4 walls. It’s to the point I’ve actually been referring to myself as bubble girl recently . Because I’ve spent the majority of the past now 3 years in bed unable to have the same involvement in things most teenagers have, it makes me feel like I’m immature and less experienced. And in some ways that’s very true because I haven’t experienced things most teens have and in others its the complete opposite because getting sick has forced me to grow up really quickly and make decisions about my life that most teenagers wouldn’t have to make.
When your pretty much bed bound you have to deal with this weird time warp. It’s like your literally watching time go by in the outside world but your frozen in time. You see everyone you grew up with growing up, maturing, participating in what life has to offer and as a comfort you remind yourself that one day that will be you. But time seems to speed by and suddenly your not the 14 year old that has years to get to be ”a normal teenager”, your almost 17 and trying to figure out where those years went and what your going to do with your future. It’s the weirdest feeling because in a way you still feel the same age as when it all started, even though you aren’t anymore. I’ve learnt from talking to others with chronic illnesses or that have faced similar hardships that this weird time warp is common. Because you spend so much energy trying to get through it that you can forget to enjoy that time of your life, in whatever small way you can.
I look at everyone else lives and fall into this fear place because I believed that my life ”should” be like theirs and I won’t learn the lessons I need to if I don’t have those same experiences. But the reality is we are all in completely different seasons of our lives. And while for the majority of others lives are spent taking part in what their season has to offer them, I’ve spent a lot of mine wishing to be in a different season instead of seeing what this one has to offer. My Mum recently told me about a lady who had cancer. When she was diagnosed she asked herself ”how she could make having cancer the best time of her life?”. She went through treatment and did everything she could to fight the cancer, while then spending every spare moment doing things that brought her joy. She took an absolutely awful season of her life and honoured it by seeing what lessons and gifts it had to offer. Since hearing her story I’ve continually asked myself how I can make being sick the best time of my life.
Someone recently asked me if I wasn’t sick right now what I would be doing with my life and I’m going to be honest I was stumped. I always thought that being sick stopped me from doing EVERYTHING I want to do, sure I can’t go to school or go to parties. But those things at the end of the day aren’t what’s important to me. I realized everything I wanted to be doing with my life I either already was or am working towards. None of that would have been possible without this season of my life. I have learnt more in the past 3 years about myself, my body and about life then I had my whole life so far!
In every season there is something you feel really aligned with and that brings so much joy to your life, even just thinking about it. For me right now it’s working with InvisiYouth on projects and campaigns. It’s helped me to get through the hardest few weeks of pain and illness I’ve had to face and given me something happy to look forward to each day. Whatever feels aligned for in your life right now do more of it! And honour each season of your life, you never know where it might lead you…
-What season of life are you in right now? And what’s the biggest thing it’s taught you? Comment down below, I’d love to know! Xx